The Teddy Bear Whisperers

SHHH, TEDDY BEARS are CONCENTRATING!

I know this whole story is new to most of you but it turns out NBC and I had an understanding to make a television show that would transform America--to make it friendlier and less stressful.. So I guess you're wondering HOW Dave Letterman got on tv--in place of me-- in the pursuit of that goal.  He is in fact a Teddy Bear Whisperer.

This will take some explaining--that's what he says and he continues to say it.  His predecessors are in fact the people who put together a plan to sell a 12-year old on the idea on writing a diary and not just any diary.  To coverup what must have been a drunken bunch of 20-something juvenile delinquent idiots Dave is on tv today with that confounding sense of backwardness that always leaves you wondering why--why he's on tv at all.

His friends or predecessors from central Pennsylvania--possibly Williamsport, Pennsylvania--got a hold of a projector and somehow figured how to project 'instructions' to be written down as diary entries.  This is easy to remember because it coincided with my first 5 days of junior high school.

As this part of the NBC--they're really saboteurs who I speak of--adventure goes the nightime stalkers, or midnight talkers had a good idea of my schedule because each night as I got ready for bed in September of my 7th grade school year the night talkers 'told' me or 'suggested' to me that I write gay stories in my diary.  They continued to tell me to do this the entire first week of my 7th grade year.

This is my goofy Dave Letterman story.  His strange style and deadend jokes are for one reason--to protect the people who did this strange thing.  Dave's friends are Teddy Bear Whisperers!!